Wife After God

If you follow my Instagram, you have seen some posts about a new devotional that I started last Sunday. Two weeks ago, I stumbled upon a photo of a book named Wife After God on Instagram. That title reeled me in quickly. Like, I bought the book the same day.

You can visit Jennifer Smith, also known on social media as Unveiled Wife, on her website here. When you hop over there, you can find her blog, her Wife After God book, and all kinds of encouragement. Let's face it...being a wife can be hard! I think Nick makes it easy for me, but there are still too many days that I don't wake up thinking about how I can fulfill my job as a godly wife that day.

This devotional helps me do that. I wake up to a short devotional about my role as a wife. Not about what he should be doing. It focuses on respecting our husbands, realizing our responsibilities as a wife, and how the most important thing is to have Christ as the center.

 She leaves us with "challenges" everyday as well. I feel like they are good marriage maintenance questions. It gives you things to talk about that aren't in everyday, sitting on the couch conversations. Nick will really open up with these. He has been asking, "What's the question for tonight?" Love that. Not every night is a question, but I love how this has already opened up conversation on things bigger than what tv show is on tonight.

On Day 2, the challenge was to tell your husband one reason you respect him. On that day, she talked about the fact that us sweet ladies are designed to long to be loved. Our burly men, on the other hand, need to feel respected. I love how God reminded me that he requires me to give my husband respect whether or not he deserved it that day or not. My favorite part of that lesson was when Jennifer said," This is where reflecting God's love story comes into focus. You will be reflecting the same unconditional, sacrifical love that Christ displayed for His bride of undeserved sinners." Didn't I receive the mercy of God? And I do/did NOT deserve it.

I love this devotional already. It gives you a daily scripture that the lesson is based on, a lesson that makes you think, a status to put up on any social media you have, a prayer, and a challenge. I love that Jennifer is using the internet and social media as a tool in this study. There is so much negative online, and I am so glad that we can fight WITH it for once. We can spread scripture and encouragement to people we don't even know. And close ones we do know. People look more than you think. Websites like Unveiled Wife and She Reads Truth are so encouraging and are doing work around this country.

I hope to share what I am learning through Wife After God. God placed it in my life at such a neat time. With Nick's graduation, family arriving soon, wrapping up life in Florida, and packing our life to move to California, I needed a time-friendly study that would make a statement but not leave me with no time to get my day going. I know it won't be the last time I go through this book.

This study will challenge me to be the wife that God has called me to be. I want for Nick and I to be STRONG as possible before he starts training around the country and we are apart. We don't have years to get ourselves together. We have to be intentional and prepare for this life now. It is not for the weak. We might be weak alone, but together in Christ, that chord will not easily be broken.

I hope you will check out this book and really pray about starting it! I would love to hear your thoughts on what God is doing in your life through it! I love being able to come together as women and having encouragement from all over.

Have a great Monday!

Victoria

It's tough being a woman #2

Good morning, ya'll!

I had a great weekend with my Mom, who was in town to see me and Nick for the weekend. We shopped and got my office set up to really start working on my Etsy shop. I haven't had the tools that I needed to really get in there and take care of business. The next few weeks I am going to work on pictures and descriptions since that is what really makes an Etsy shop! For now its so-so, but I really want to expand and do some neat things to bring in the big bucks....kidding on that! Here is the link, or you can use the link above that says "My Etsy Shop".

I got a little emotional during the time my mom was here. I wanted her to stay longer. That's it, plain and simple. We had such a good weekend and in the back of my mind, I knew some big changes are heading my way. I will be heading to California where it is a 2 day drive....not 8 hours. I will know only my husbands friends. We will start to search for a church home (HARDEST THING EVER). And I will have to wait and see where God wants me to invest and what big plans he has waiting on me 2,000 miles away.

But God has been preparing me. Though I have studied Esther before, He put it right back in front of me. He knew I was needing a little refresher on total dependence on Him. He showed me that I needed to trust Him even when He only gives me enough light to see one step in front of me. That is all the light I need. I'll be honest and say sometimes I have to tell myself that more than I believe it, unfortunately.

He's not showing me what's ahead. But from what He has shown me so far, I already know He is faithful. 

We started this bible study with faith that God wanted to show us something whether there were 20 girls or just my friend and I. We posted it all over the internet. We are both in a military spouse Facebook group and that was where we got the most feedback. I was a little nervous to put it up. In today's world, you never kow what someone is going to say when you "talk Christian". But then I thought about what it means to be bold. And if that's one of my words for the year...I was going to have to start somewhere. I want to be BOLD for Jesus. Right here where I know people. I was also waiting on the message telling me that sort of post is not allowed in the group. That message never came. Only positive feedback came our way. We had girls signing up within the hour!

Two weeks later, there we were in my living room. Praying, eating, drinking coffee. Seriously, there is nothing better. Through the weeks, we added more and more girls. I thank the Lord I am able to stay home.  But I do believe that God is allowing me to be a stay at home wife at this time for this very reason. To serve ladies I don't know. To serve Nick when he is working 12 hours a day. I love this season of my life. It won't last forever. Children will come and I will think back to how easy it was. But I am THANKFUL for this season.

The bonds in this study will not be easily broken. I saw one friendship bloom more and more each week. They will be sweet, lifelong friends. We prayed for one another, rejoiced for our husbands passing the next test, and stayed and talked for hours after the study ended. It was so sweet. Though most of these girls will never see each other again, I know when we pass our bookcase and see that green workbook, we will think back to the sweet faces that brought us encouragement each Thursday morning. I pray this group will continue to grow as we all go our different ways. I pray that each of us starts a new study with new faces that just want to fellowship with another sister in Christ. And hopefully with those who don't know Christ, and that they would come to know the Sweetest Face of all.

 Esther Bible Study Group (minus a few)!!

Here is the link to the post about one of my favorite weeks of the study. This was my second time to do Esther. I plan on doing it again in a couple of years!

Victoria

God is Big

Happy Wednesday, ladies! This week is flying by and after yesterday, I'm thankful for that! Just a flat tire in town. But when your husband is in training, that's not really reason enough to get a hold of him. Roadside and a new tire made it an all day event, but thankfully I have a friend here who could take me home while I waited on the old tire to be replaced. And might I say.....it's really, really hot in Florida.

Today, I wanted to tell you a little bit about my struggle when I first moved to Destin, and how God has completely blessed me. Like I have said before, I really knew no one. I joined a fb group that included wives of husbands that are in the naval school here at Eglin AFB. I have figured out tons because of this group. It is such a blessing for wives who move here from all over the country. The information ranges from "Where do I take my child to the ER?" to "What's the best place to get ice cream?". Ice cream is an important thing in Florida.......IT'S HOT.

So there I was, newly married and alone all day with only my GPS to guide me through the town. From October- January, I didn't make a friend. Not one. I was lonely and thinking, "There has to be a system to this military wife thing. This can't be normal". Most of my days were spent on the phone with my best friend talking about the situation. Funny thing with this friend, we always seem to be in the same situation. It always seems like common ground to encourage each other through. Something about someone knowing where you are coming from just helps the heart. We cried together, brainstormed on ways to meet other wives, and called each other excitedly every time we met a potential friend.

Those few months, we dug into the Word together and each on our own. I see now how God used the time I had no friends and no family around to draw me to Him. Socially, it was the quiestest time in my life. Spiritually, I heard God loud and clear. He wanted me to depend on Him completely. What better time to learn that He never leaves me than when I have nothing else to distract me. Babies haven't come. Husband is in training 12 hours a day. I am a housewife with hours to fill with dishes to clean, toilets to scrub, and food to cook (bad order, I know).

So January came. The end of Christmas break. I cried on the way back to Florida. Crocodile tears. But that first week back in Florida I decided I was going to be intentional. It wasn't very long before I learned about the new FRG that was starting. It was new leaders and looked like something I could really get involved in. One day, as I checked my email, I saw a newsletter from the FRG. They were planning their first meeting. Something about a new group doesn't seem as intimidating as a group that's been going for years. That decision led me to meeting a very sweet friend and my involvement in the FRG now. What a blessing it has been. I have gotten to know the leaders and really enjoy helping them out with all the events. They are so welcoming and ready to help with any questions they have. I now believe I know more about what's going on in the EOD school community than my husband does. Ok, that might be stretching it, but I know more about the cook-outs than he does!! :) This group is so important for new comers. It's such an easy way to meet friends who are going through exactly what you are going through!

The other blessing that has multiplied over the last 6 months was the bible study I joined in January. I literally looked up "bible studies in Niceville, FL" on google and went to the first one I found. It was being held at First Baptist and they were going to start "Discerning The Voice of God" by Priscilla Shirer. I highly reccomend that study by the way. I met Lauren and Krista that first meeting and we three hit it off instantly. Weekly beach trips and coffee talk were musts after that. I said my first "military wife goodbye" to Krista as her and her blooming family moved to Ft. Polk. It's been so fun to look back on how God placed us together for support and just good, healthy friendships.

As we were finishing the study at First Baptist, God really put it on our hearts to start up a bible study in my home for military wives. Lauren and I posted our idea on the FB page and the feedback we instantly got was amazing! I was so excited to see other military wives want to study God's word together. I have watched friendships bloom over the past six weeks of doing Beth Moore's Esther study. We have found support and life long friendships because of Jesus. This week, we are adding seven NEW members to the group. YES. I said seven!! How faithful is our God? How BIG is our God? He delivers more than I could ever dream up myself. Oh, the joy that I feel when I think of how he is blessing this study. I can't wait to see how God works in the last 4 weeks of Esther. He is showing me things in my life that need HIM. He is showing me how much I need HIM. I am thankful to be passed these first set of growing pains. Yes, they will come again. But I learned so, so much through them. God is patient and consistent. He drew me in and won't let me go.

That was a long one. I just know there are women who feel like I felt when I moved to a new place. Loneliness occurs. Desperation to make a friend happens. I want you to know that it will pass. God is there. Maybe it's just time to be still. To put all your effort into your relationship with God. When my eyes are on Him, nothing seems as terrible as I thought.

Have a wonderful Wednesday...I'm off to the gym for my class!

Victoria

it's tough being a woman

Ya'll, this Esther study is amazing. Amazing girls, homework, and fellowship. And an amazing God we get to know more with each passing day.

What is our role as women in this world? Is being a just a wife good enough? Do I have as much purpose as those business women accomplishing big goals everyday? I mean, my goal yesterday was to get my cabinets straightened out so I can easily get to my hair products and find a small amount of space for my husbands deodorant (Don't judge...I'm a hair dresser).

This week, our discussion was "It's tough being a woman in another woman's shadow". Ouch. We all like to think, "Oh no, not me. I am confident in who I am." So, why is it when I look on Instagram or Facebook and see everyone's bright pictures of their latest nail color or cute shoes, do I suddenly feel the urge to take a shopping trip to the nearest department store? I'm almost positive someone could post a picture of their garbage can, and if they photoshopped it enough, I'd be ready to jump in the car and go get my new, awesome garbage can. Where am I putting my identity? In what color my nails are or Who my Father is?

"One goal of our study is to let God heal our world-torn souls and make us experience His security in our reality"- Beth Moore

Thank goodness That Father is merciful. He knows my heart. He knows where I fall short. But He loves me so much anyways. He wants me to completely be satisfied in HIM. I am secure in Him. He never makes me feel inadequate. --Such confidence we have through Christ toward God. Not that we are adequate in ourselves to consider anything as coming from ourselves, but our adequacy is from God who also made us adequate as servants of a new covenant, not of the letter but of the Spirit; for the letter kills, but the Spirit gives life. 2 Corinthians 3: 4-6. 

So what's MY purpose in this work-driven world? How do I answer when people say, "You don't work? What do you do then?". I'm still practicing that answer. It's definitely feels like a cut when people ask. I don't think they mean it in a bad way though. I'm so so blessed to be able to stay home, get together for bible study, and have dinner ready (most days) when Nick gets home. It didn't solve all my problems the moment I got to say I was a stay at home wife. You have to choose joy in all circumstances, which I am not the best at by any means. My purpose should be to find ways to serve God. I'm working on that servant's heart. It does not come naturally. I'm really selfish. Probably abnormally selfish. Marriage is showing me that for sure.

I hope you don't feel like you are living in another woman's shadow. That is not how God wants you to feel. Boast in the Lord! You are beautifully created by God. Have security in knowing you are HIS.

Victoria